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In The Beginning…

Foreword

When I decided to write this piece my intent was to center it around my early experience with religion and the mark that it’s left on my personality and my general outlook on life. But as I began to write I found that by dredging up old memories about this subject, other memories/issues, both pleasant and unpleasant, also began to surface. Try as I might I could not separate one from the other, and consequently the original subject theme began to go in a direction that I had not anticipated nor originally planned. Long forgotten episodes involving my parents and their slow hellish descent into religious fundamentalism came rushing to the surface and almost all but gushed onto the printed page. I kept trying to refocus my writing on the original theme, but the more I thought about how to go about it the more appropriate the wayward passages seemed. So I kept writing and writing.

For me it has been and continues to be a very painful journey.  But, it is my history and I need to tell it as I remember it happening.

 

In The Beginning…

I

For many, many, years I have struggled with the concept of religion. One of my early memories is that of my attending a Catholic church in Houston, Nuestra Senora De Dolores (Our Lady of Sorrows), with my mother, and being slightly frightened by the spookiness of the statues placed on and around the altar. The pleading eyes, cast skyward, and the upturned palms forever frozen in a pathetically submissive pose gave me the frozen willies. We weren’t Catholic by any means, actually we weren’t anything religious-wise, but with the cards that life had dealt my mother, any help imagined or real, was certainly welcome. And for her, the church seemed like a good way out of her personal marital misery.

The main difficulty in my mom’s life was my father. He was most certainly what I would describe as an undiagnosed alcoholic; and like most alcoholics he never admitted to the fact that when he drank he didn’t stop until he passed out or he ran out of money. For all his faults he was an extremely talented man. Blessed with an eye for detail and possessing an uncompromising, but sharply analytical mind, he earned a good salary by repairing and painting cars. Because he was able to restore wrecks to an almost showroom like appearance he was in high demand in the auto repair world and was paid accordingly.

His best job ever was at a Ford dealership in Houston where he ran the body shop for a couple of years. I was too young to remember him working there, but my mother would often tell me about the good times…before the drinking started.

What I do remember is seeing my mom waiting inside by the front door on Fridays, waiting for my dad to bring home the paycheck. That usually never happened. More often than not she would wait and wait, telling me that as soon as dad comes home we’ll go to the grocery store and buy a lot of groceries.  Late afternoon would slide into dusk, then night. And in the dim light of our two worn out shade-less lamps, with my mother’s soft sobs softly lulling me, I would drift off to sleep on her lap.

Usually showing up early Sunday morning, hung over, bruised from fighting, and completely broke, his never ending excuse was that, ‘his feet went out from under him’, or that ‘he gave in to his weak side’. Whatever. It all added up to yet another week of trying to figure out what we would eat, and my mother mending my pants and shirts for school.

Although he very rarely missed work because of the drinking he most likely gained a reputation as a not so reliable family man. I’m sure he had all good intentions during the week, and worked very hard, but as soon as that pay envelope hit his pocket on Friday his feet would start their inevitable slide. Much later in life he found religion (or rather, it found him) and he became a dyed-in-the-wool Pentecostal fundamentalist with all the trimmings—well, short of snake handling.

Because of his appetite for alcohol (whiskey please, make it Four Roses, no beer) he never made much of his life work-wise. It wasn’t that he didn’t have talent. He had plenty. Early on he discovered that he had a knack for fixing things. If it was broken, given enough time, he could fix it. Good eye for color and, despite the drinking, a steady hand. These abilities would serve him well as an auto and diesel engine mechanic, paint and body auto repairman, furniture refinisher and an amateur inventor.

But what he possessed in raw talent would ultimately be grossly overshadowed by his lack of self-discipline in his personal life. He seemed to react negatively to anyone in authority, all of our relatives (his and my mom’s), all minorities, and most Christians, and to this end he had a name for everyone. I never had to leave my house to hear words like kikes, niggers, burr-heads and wops. There weren’t many Asians around but those who happened to cross his path merited being called chinks and slopes.  Mexicans were wet-backs and greasers; and because I heard these insults on a daily basis for as long as I could remember, they had little effect on me—except for the insults to Mexicans. My mom was born of Mexican parents.

He was born in Saltillo, Mexico, in 1914, of Spanish/French descendants.  His parents had tried to emigrate to the U.S. from France in late 1913, arriving by ship in Brownsville, TX.  After determining that the family’s paperwork was not acceptable the U.S. Immigration Service refused to allow them into the country and unceremoniously ordered them back aboard the ship.

Since the ship’s next port of call was Tampico the captain graciously allowed them to remain aboard until they docked there a few days later.  He had suggested they try to enter Mexico there since the country’s immigration service was less picky with paperwork—especially when sweetened with a little bribe. As luck, and a little spare change, would have it they were immediately admitted and quickly found themselves on the right continent, just the wrong country.

The young couple was already burdened with four small boys and an infant girl, but stubbornly decided to use their remaining cash reserves to travel north to attempt re-entry into the U.S.  They got as far as Saltillo, where they found out that they would soon be welcoming a new child into their already large family.  With money running perilously low they found a cheap rental and temporarily settled in to look for work.

On August 22, 1914, my father was born in a dirt floored adobe shanty and was named Roberto Francisco Alberto DeLeón.  Throughout the pregnancy the couple’s dreams of living in America never dimmed and with dogged determination the entire family, except for little Dolores, had worked any and all odd jobs that had come along.  Three weeks after his birth, my father, carried on his mother’s back crossed the border at Nuevo Laredo, Texas.    Two weeks later, freshly designated as Resident Aliens and sporting brand new green ID cards, the family finally arrived at their original destination: Houston, Texas.

Since my father never talked about his family I really never knew much about them.  One day when I was about fourteen I did run across some old pictures of them while rummaging through some old boxes in a closet.  Among them was a most evocative photo of a stately looking couple that was probably taken to commemorate some milestone such as an anniversary, or possibly a birthday.  The photo is undated but their clothing and demeanor suggest it may have been taken sometime between 1910 and 1920.

I took the photo to my mom and asked her who these people were.

“Well, they’re your dad’s parents.”  She said smugly.

“Really?”  I looked closer at the slightly curled photograph.

My grandfather, sporting a healthy handlebar moustache and a healthier waistline, was dressed in a vested suit, military style boots, and was wearing a natty pocket watch and gold chain.  His wife, modestly plump with a lace type hat, was dressed in a long gown-like floor-length silk dress trimmed with dainty lace on the hem, and tightly buttoned all the way to her neck.  They both appeared to be in their late forties or early fifties, and while angled towards each other and scowling unpleasantly at the camera, still managed to project a sense of highborn sophistication and well-being.  They certainly don’t look like peasants.

It seems that my father, once having reached the seventh grade in school, probably decided that his time would be better spent if he were working full time.  Having already shown the ability to fix broken down car engines he dropped out of school and began to do odd jobs around the neighborhood.  Word of mouth quickly spread and soon he was in great demand as a reliable shade tree mechanic and was knocking down some pretty good money.  Since he was already addicted to Camel cigarettes, liked to party, and was starting to really like whiskey, the money he earned seemed to quickly disappear–thus necessitating the need to work harder and earn more.

During this particular period of time I don’t know what my uncles and aunt were doing.  Anytime I would ask my father he would just dismiss the question with a wave of his hand and say, “You know, just knocking about.”  Uh, OK.  The only episode he ever shared with me that involved one of his siblings was when he told me about the serious injury he had suffered at the hands of his sister, Dolores.

As the story went, he and Dolores, in their mid-teens, had been home alone while the rest of the family was out earning a living.  Entering their kitchen he saw Dolores playing with a large kitchen knife apparently sword-fighting with some invisible opponent.  Being a good and concerned brother he told her to put the knife away before she hurt herself.  Her response was less than civil, pretty much telling him to piss off.  Insisting that she either put the knife away or give it to him for safe keeping she got annoyed and told him to try to take it from her.  So he did.

Quickly reaching for and grabbing the knife, he yanked it back toward himself.  Before he had time to think he saw blood literally gush from his hand and he felt a deep cold sensation shoot up his hand and wrist.  His anger at his sister’s challenge to his machismo had caused him to ignore the fact that she was holding the knife by its handle and he, in his haste, had grabbed the blade.  The result was that the knife’s blade had all but severed his right index finger at the second joint.  His other three fingers had also been cut but not to the same extent.  Not having the money to go to a hospital or even see a doctor, he and his sister wrapped the wound with dishtowels and a hastily torn pillowcase and waited for the rest of the family to return.

The cut was never stitched up and took weeks to finally heal.  As a result of the severe laceration, tendons, and probably a few nerves, were severed causing complete loss of feeling in the finger and leaving him with the inability to bend the finger at will towards his palm.  The finger was always at attention and when a fist was required he would have to use his thumb to grab it and hold it securely against the palm.  The injury ended up classifying him as 4F, and kept him out of World War II.

Given the time in which he was born, and living in Houston in the years after World War I, and through the Great Depression, I assume the young Robert would have been exposed to quite a bit of ethnic and racial intolerance left over from years of slavery.  But because he was tri-lingual (English, Spanish, and French), he would have had to associate with many multi-cultured people of diverse backgrounds and differing lifestyles.  But if these relationships ended up affecting this tall, thin, wickedly handsome young man in some negative manner I’ll never know.  What I do know is that in 1939, at age twenty-five, year he met and married my mom: a beautiful dark skinned Mexican-American beauty named Avelina Gómez.  She, and her twin brother Marcos, were born in 1918 in San Antonio, Texas, making them not only Texans but bonafide U.S. citizens.

They had met because Avelina’s older sister, Juanita, had been dating a close friend of my father’s.  How he had overcome his extreme bias towards Mexicans to begin dating my mother is still a mystery to me.  I can only assume that her dark and sultry beauty, coupled with her goofy sense of humor, made my father look past her ethnicity.

Because of her family’s extreme poverty, she, her brother, and all of the sisters would often be taken out of school to travel to South Texas, and even Mexico, in search of transient jobs in order to bring in money for the family.  As a result her education went as far as the third grade when the family finally decided that her reading and writing ability had reached a good enough level for her to manage the simple tasks that her menial labor jobs required.

Her command of the English and Spanish vocabulary was passable, but she would forever suffer from the inability to speak, read, or write effectively in either language.  As a result she developed a loopy habit of totally mispronouncing and/or creatively substituting made up words or phrases for ones she wasn’t familiar with.  Consequently, I grew up thinking that a sandwich was “un samwish”,   a chair became “una share”, any pasta was referred to as “la sopa” (actually sopa means soup), and a ditch was verbalized as “un deeche” (dee-che).  Spanglish became the official language around the house and unless I was at school spoke it constantly.

My father, even after being married to her for over thirty years, would still—upon hearing mom massacre some English or Spanish word—turn and stare wide-eyed shaking his head simply mumbling under his breath, “Vieja loca.”

II

Younger Brothers, Desperados?

In Texas folklore there exists a group of highwaymen known as the Younger Brothers.  A gang of rustlers, train and bank robbers, and murderers in the 1800’s, they occasionally partnered in crime with the more famous James gang who were finally brought to justice by stubbornly persistent Pinkerton lawmen, and the citizens of Northfield, Minnesota.

According to my father the Younger’s descendants, had settled in southwest Texas, and sometime after the Depression founded a trucking company specializing in hauling oil and gasoline for wholesalers in Texas and Louisiana.  Whether or not these were the actual descendants remains a mystery to me.  But according to my father they had to be at least related because of the smooth way they were able to finagle outrageous profits while at the same time cheating their employees out of an honest wage.  They must’ve learned it somewhere!

Formed in Houston in the early 1930’s, the modern day Youngers successfully built the business, and by the 1940’s owned a city block of oily pothole filled land on Griggs Road.  Every day big rigs pulling long tubular trailers would rumble onto the huge truck lot to be cleaned, repaired, repainted and refilled; while their drivers ambled over to the main office to check in, draw their pay, and receive their new loads and destinations.

On the Younger’s truck lot, and right off the street were some small buildings that served as administrative offices, and about two-thirds back, and to the right, were three large open door tin buildings.  Two were designated as “Mechanics” and “Tires”, and the third, quite a bit larger was the “Paint” shop.  My uncle Frank worked in that building until he retired and left the shop for my father to work, and went to California—never to be heard from again.

The “Mechanics” shop was where all the repairs to the giant diesel engines that pulled the enormous loads of gas, oil, and pipes went when they needed to get well.  Both it, and the “Tires” buildings were run by a mean spirited, red haired, fifty something bigot everyone called “Red”. Among the subordinates working for him was an unfortunate crew of black laborers whose responsibility was to repair tires, change oil in the diesel engines, and perform probably the most dangerous job on the lots, steam clean out the large oil and gasoline tanks the diesel trucks towed from the oil refineries to the various distribution centers.

Red made sure he fed those boys their daily ration of indignities with foul-mouthed calls of “come on nigger”, “shit burr-head”, “move, you jive ass darky”, “over here you monkey ass shine”.  Their response was always the same: a quick ducking of the head, as if dodging an invisible flying fist, a flash of white eyeball with a fast white toothy grin, and a flick of the wrist to wipe away the dripping beads of sweat off the forehead.

“Yowsa boss, you got dat right…,” was their usual response

The rhythmic metallic pounding of a huge sledgehammer on a stubborn tire bead weather welded to a rusty rim would rise just a degree or two in cadence after that.

Shooting a vile glance in the direction of the object of his scorn Red would flip his head sideways and shoot a brownish green jet of tobacco spittle onto the oily ground.  Wiping his mouth with the back of his tattooed hand he’d end the tirade with his signature rant: “Fukin’ lazy-assed niggers, anyway!”

In addition to the blacks, there was a pair of young white men who everyone believed were brothers, and who did the actual diesel engine repair.  In the many trips that I made to that shop over the years I never heard either of them say one word—to anyone, or to each other. They appeared to be in their early twenties, bald and heavily muscled, and would spend their workday quietly turning bolts, pulling engines, scooting under trucks wielding huge wrenches, all the while whistling some unrecognizable melody.  I once asked my father what their names were and he said everyone called them, “the mutes.”

Occasionally Red would have to address them in reference to some newly arrived broken down diesel.

“Yo!”

They would slowly stop what they were doing and turn their attention to Red.

“Got a fukin’ Wentworth put a rod through the pan and need to get it done and out quick!  Git’r done now and finish that there later.”

Wordlessly they’d stop ratcheting or gauging, and walk over to the kerosene filled tub in the center of the shop.  After dropping the tools into the tub to soak off the grease they’d stand quietly, huge bare arms crossed over their mammoth chests, staring at Red and waiting for the broken truck to be towed into the shop.

Having dispensed his orders, Red would quickly leave their immediate area mumbling under his breath about those “fuckin’ mutes”.  Glancing back and making sure he was a safe distance he’d flash a nervous semi-toothless tobacco juice stained grin to whomever he thought was listening. The brothers would continue to stare, shooting a fierce blue-green eyed glare in Red’s direction until their new broken down charge was towed into their bay.

When not berating his minions Red spent his time sitting on an ancient folding chair chewing tobacco, spitting on the floor and sipping cheap whiskey from an old fruit jar carefully stowed in his grease stained tool box.  Drivers waiting for their trucks to be serviced would stroll in to the shop to see how the work was progressing and linger long enough to get a little taste of that “hair of the dog” from Red.

Further back on the lot was the much larger tin building that housed the paint and body shop.  A talented auto painter and body repairman, my uncle Frank had worked for Younger Brothers Trucking almost since its founding.  He had no one working for him and did all the work himself.  And no one, except for my father and the Youngers themselves, was ever allowed into the shop during working hours.  Even when I went to visit he always met me at the entrance and would usher me to one of a pair of wooden folding chairs placed just inside the entrance to the shop.

When he wasn’t wearing his white painter’s coveralls, hat, white military-like boots and a large facemask and goggles, he could always be found in neatly pressed khaki pants and a dark brown gabardine shirt.  And while the diesel repair shop was filthy, engine parts and tools spread around the floor willy-nilly, and the whole place smelling of diesel fuel, oil and sweat, the paint and body shop was pristine.  Shelves stacked with neat rows of gallon cans of acrylic and lacquer paint, tint and mineral oil were arranged in such a manner that one would think they were on display for purchase.  Cans that had been opened were resealed and wiped clean with such care that they would easily pass for new.  Those were kept on a different shelf and arranged by type and color.

The rough concrete floor was swept out and hosed several times a day—whether or not a body repair or a paint job had been completed.  On another wall white coveralls on clothes hangers were hung on pegs.  None of them ever seemed to have been used as they shone as white as the day they had left the uniform factory.  There were at least twelve sets, each with a pair of shiny black rubber boots on the floor under them.

Hammers, anvils and other body repair tools were neatly hung on large black pegboard sheets, with each respective shape outlined in white paint.  In one corner a large fan sat quietly, its blades and motor casing gleaming in the sunlight streaming in from the windows in the roof and high up on each wall.  Six exhaust fans were built in to the back wall and kept the shop reasonably cool when not pulling paint vapors out into the hot Houston air.  Except for the sweetly faint aroma of lacquer one would be hard pressed to believe that truck bodies were actually disassembled, banged back into shape, reassembled, sprayed with primer and painted with countless coats of lacquer back to showroom-like condition.

At the end of each day when Red and his crew would trudge out of their shop smelling of whiskey and the kerosene they had used to wash the grease off their hands and bodies, my uncle Frank would emerge from his small wash room smelling of cologne and Vitalis; a smartly cocked fedora perched on this slightly balding head.  Whistling a jaunty tune he’d close and lock the large shop door, pull the canvas cover off his never more than two year old Ford, and ease slowly out into the Houston traffic.

+++++++++++

It was a fact that Younger Brothers Truck Line, Inc., paid the very lowest wage to their employees, offered no benefits whatsoever, and docked pay whenever any time was taken off for any reason.  My father worked for them for over twenty years, and when he finally left he was given absolutely nothing other than his last paycheck.  For the remainder of his life he survived on Social Security, payments for small odd jobs he did for friends, and a pathetic pittance he received once he was ordained as a minister for the Pentecostal church.

So how did he end up there?  And why would he continue to work for Younger Brothers anyhow?  We’ll talk about that in the next posting.

 

Stress.. (Part 2)

…Stress 2

 

In June of 1960 I graduated from Jeff Davis High School in Houston, Texas.  The occasion was hardly acknowledged by my parents as I had already been told not to expect them to pay for any type of expense associated with the event.  They were too committed to the church and any extra money would go there; certainly not to some frivolous and meaningless ceremony that would not guarantee their getting into heaven.

And so it was that my cap and gown rental and my high school senior ring were mostly paid for with money given to me by someone other than my own parents.  A kind of charity within family that actually caused me a great deal of stress and plunged into my heart a painful grudge-filled dagger that would take many years for me to remove.

Part 2

A few months before the end of my final high school semester a rare phone call was received at my house.  My mother having answered the phone, called for me in a highly unusual singsong tone that said, “Good news is on the way.”  Putting down my homework I saw that she had put the receiver between her breasts and was urgently beckoning me to her with a rapid waving of her free hand.

Whispering, while at the same time forming each word graphically with her lips, eyes and forehead, she said, “It’s your uncle, quick–quick!”

“For me?  What does he want?”

Eyebrows arching and eyes bulging she said, “I don’t know, but maybe….” and at that point she began to rapidly rub her thumb and forefinger together signifying that money was surely on the way.  The phone was forcefully thrust into my hand and I hesitatingly greeted my Uncle Frank.

Before I go on let me tell you a little about my uncle Frank and the rest of the DeLeón clan.  My dad was the youngest in a family of five brothers and one sister and because of the DeLeón family’s tendency to lead very private, solitary, and distant lives, I never got to know any of them really well.  Of all my father’s siblings I was only acquainted with three: Louis, the oldest, who with his wife Mary, owned a small grocery store in east Houston; Dolores, married to one Bill Byers, worked for Sears in some type of clerical job; and Frank, a widower who had lost a wife and two daughters to tuberculosis in the late 1930’s, and now lived alone. He worked for Younger Brothers Truck Line in Houston as a journeyman painter.  It was he for whom I’d been named.  Don’t ask why because I haven’t the slightest idea.

Lastly, there were two other brothers, Joe and George.  Joe, the second oldest brother, was a shadowy figure who was never discussed in our house.  Once, while rummaging through some old boxes in my mother’s closet, I came upon a picture, probably taken in one of those self photo booths, showing a round cherub faced little man dressed in an army uniform balancing a large blond woman on his lap. While she appeared to be panning an over exaggerated toothy smile towards the camera, his attention was seriously riveted on her rather large and mostly exposed breasts.  His cap was set at a precariously jaunty angle, and on his sleeves he displayed the rank of sergeant.  When I asked my mother who these people were she said it was my uncle Joe and one of his whores.

“Where does he live”, I asked, “and how come no one ever told me about him?”

“No one knows where he is, and we don’t talk about him because he’s not good people.  Now, put that picture back where you found it and don’t tell your dad that you know about your uncle Joe.”

I never knew I had an uncle George until one day my father came home from work and told my mom that his brother had died of a massive heart attack.  From overheard whispers between my parents I learned that he had been forty-four, worked at a steel mill in Houston, was married and had three daughters.  I don’t know if my father ever went to his brother’s funeral.  I know I didn’t.

OK, back to the story: Putting the phone up to my ear with my mom anxiously wide-eyed and edging close to me to try to catch any word slipping out from between the phone and my ear, I heard my uncle’s husky voice greet me.  He spoke with a sort of Jimmy Durante accent that all the DeLeón brothers, except my father, used, (when saying “church” it sounded like “choich”), and he quickly got to the point.

He asked if I was going to graduate from high school in June.  I told him I was.  He then inquired if I had already paid for my cap and gown rental whether I had purchased a senior ring.  I explained that I had managed to pay the deposit on my ring by using the wages that I had earned that past summer while working as a busboy for a local Mexican restaurant and the Shamrock Hilton hotel, but wasn’t sure how I was going to pay for the balance. I also told him that I probably wouldn’t be renting the cap and gown because I wasn’t planning on attending the graduation ceremony that was going to held at the Houston Coliseum.

“What do you mean you’re not going to the ceremony?’

“Well…,”my mind racing for a cover lie, “I really don’t want to go because it’s just a silly show, and they really don’t give you a diploma, it’s just a rolled up piece of paper.  They mail you the real diploma later.”  That had been my father’s line.  He used it to justify to me why I should skip the ceremony and instead go somewhere meaningful, like church.  I’d heard it so many times before that it just slid off my tongue like a well-memorized Bible verse.  I saw a little smile cross my mother’s face.

My uncle began to say something then abruptly stopped.  After making some noises that sounded like he was clearing his throat he asked if there was any way I could come to visit him at work on Friday.  I told him that we went to church every night, but maybe if I caught the city bus right after school I could make it there and back before I was expected to be ready to leave for church.  In any event I would have to clear it with my dad before I could commit to the visit.

“Choich, on Friday?  OK boy, you come see me this Friday before choich.” he said.  “It should take you about an hour if you catch the buses just right, so I’ll expect to see you here no later than 4 o’clock–OK?  It won’t be a long visit so you should be home by five-thirty so you can go to choich.  I’ll see you then.”

“But what if my dad says I can’t go?”

“He won’t, boy…don’t worry, he won’t.”  “Bye.”  And the line went dead.

My mother took the phone, placed it on the receiver and, flashing all her teeth said, “Well?”

“Uh, he wants me to visit him on Friday at work.  But, I told him we went to church and I may not be able to go.”

“Did he say anything about money?”

“No, he just asked if I had paid for my graduation cap and gown and school ring.”

“I heard you tell him about paying for part of it with your savings from your summer jobs.  That was stupid, because if he plans to give you money now it won’t be as much.”

‘He didn’t say anything about giving me money,” I said, getting a bit irritated.

“Well, why else would he want to see you?  It’s not like he cares about you . Anyway, you plan on going to see him on Friday and I’ll talk to your dad and make sure he’s OK with it.  I’ll even ask him to give you some bus fare.”

Well, a few days later my mother gave me a one dollar bill and told me to go to see my uncle on Friday.  Wow, someone had obviously greased some wheels big time.

After three bus transfers and an hour after I started my journey I arrived at Younger Brothers Truck line on Griggs Street.  The company consisted of an oily dirt and shell lot encompassing an entire city block and ringed by a ten foot steel chain link fence.  A few square flat roofed buildings that served as administrative offices sat to the left as I entered through the squeaky gate.  Each building was painted in an anonymous shade of gray with green tinted glass windows sprouting large rectangular AC units noisily dripping steady streams of extracted water onto the exposed concrete foundation below.

To the right three large silver tin buildings with large open rollup doors and high small windows near the top rose from the brown, black and gray hardtack.  Each tin building had its function spray painted on one of the outside walls: “Tires”, “Mechanical”, and “Paint Shop”.  The printing on the first two buildings appeared to have been made by some second or third grader, displaying a mix of upper and lower case lettering and curving slight lower towards the end, but the last one’s signage was immaculate.  That building, I knew, belonged to my uncle Frank.

The center of the property had various pumps, hoses and concrete platforms bulging out of the ground, and the rear seemed to have been reserved as a parking lot for trucks in various states of repair.  As I made my way towards the paint shop several roughneck type characters, dressed in grimy green or tan khaki shirts and pants–making their way to and from the tin buildings–greeted me with a quick “howdy” and a frighteningly accurate jet of brownish-green spittle shot at some invisible target on the ground.  A very large and very black bald man wearing a single strapped blue and white set of coveralls chopped off at the knees was bent over in front of the “Tires” building wrestling with a tire and rim larger than anything I had ever seen before.  As I passed he quickly turned his head.

“Hey there skinny little white person..ya lost?”

“No sir, I’m headed to the paint shop to see my uncle Frank.”

Breaking into a smile that exposed a never ending set of the whitest teeth, he chortled,  “Sir?  Little boy you don’t call me sir–I call you sir.  Get it, ya’ll?”

“Yes sir, um..I mean, yes…..sir.”

Grinning larger with huge beads of sweat pouring off his head onto his massive shoulders he said, “Hee, hee, you sometin’ else boy!  I’m Shine, what yo name?”

“Frank.”

“Frank?  Yo name Frank?  And yo uncle is Mr. Frank?”

“Yes sir.  Um, yes.”

“Dat too funny boy.  Go on now, go see yo uncle Frank.  Yo needs Shine to walks yo over dere?”

“No s..no.  I see the paint shop.”

“OK, if yo needs anyting just yells ‘SHINE’, and I come runnin.  Get on boy.”

“Bye…..Shine.”

As I began to walk away Shine turned his full attention back to the monster tire, throwing it flat on the ground and jumping up and down on it trying to break the bead from the rim.

Approaching the paint shop I began to smell the pleasing candy-like aroma of lacquer.  The shop was huge and the ceiling was at least thirty feet high.  On the back wall there were six huge exhaust fans running full blast causing a gentle cool breeze to breathe through the large front entrance.  As I walked through the door I saw a big green diesel truck gleaming in the subdued light of the shop.  It looked like it had just been built, announcing “PeterBilt” in chrome that shone like glassy crystal, paint smooth and flowing like green emerald ice, and rubber stripping laid in like soft black marshmallow.  It was absolutely the most beautiful vehicle I had ever seen.

Suddenly, from behind the truck a man appeared.  At first glance he looked like some beekeeper, dressed all in white from head to foot.  White netting flowed from his fedora-like hat down to his shoulders and his pants were tucked into his white military style boots.

Taking off his hat I saw that he was wearing some type of mask over his mouth and nose; and that came off next.

“Hey boy,” he said in that Jimmy Durante tone (buoy).  “Like the truck?”

“Yeah, it’s so cool.”

“Was a total wreck when I got it.  Had to rebuild it from the frame up.  Nice, huh?”

“Yeah”, I said with heavy awe.

“How was the bus ride?”

“Huh?, Oh, OK.”

He waved me over to a couple of folding chairs (white) against one of the shop walls.  “You thirsty?  Want something to drink?  I got coffee.”

“No, thanks uncle.”

“Well then, let’s get down to business.  So, you a smart guy and graduating high school, eh?”

“Yes.”

“Good grades?”

“Mostly.”

“Going to college?”

“No, we don’t have any money for college.  My mom and dad want me to go to work right away to help pay them back for the expense of raising me.”

“WHAT?”  (Sounded like “WAAAAAAAT?”)  “That’s bullshit.  Don’t tell them I said that.  They’ll be mad.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t”

“What you owe for the ring?”

“Well, it was fifty dollars and I paid twenty five down.  So I still have to pay twenty five to take delivery.”

“What about the gown and the cap?”

“Rental is five dollars, but I don’t need them ’cause I’m not going to the graduation.  For the school senior pictures I can borrow someone else’s.”

“No, no borrowing.  You need your own.  Then maybe you change your mind and go to the ceremony.”

“Well, even if I wanted to go, I don’t have a ride.  My dad won’t take me ’cause he’s got church.”

“Church? (Choich)  He thinks he’s pretty holy, eh?”

“I don’t know.”

“So, how much for the rental?”

“Five dollars.”

Looking up to the high ceiling of his paint shop he drew a long lingering breath and closed his eyes.  He sat there very still for a bit then opened his eyes and looked at me.

“You know, none of us ever finished school.  Your father went to the seventh grade and he quit.  He had the best chance to finish, but he quit.  Wanted to make money so he could do what he wanted to do.  Mostly, that was to drink and have fun while the rest of us worked.  But, don’t tell him I told you that.”

“OK, I won’t.”

He got up slowly, first putting his gloved hands on his knees and pushing himself upright.  Straightening up he took his gloves off and put them on the folding chair. Reaching into his right front pocket he pulled out a greenish-gray cylinder wrapped with a large rubber band.  He began to roll off the rubber band and when he had it off I saw that the cylinder was made up of paper currency.  He tucked the rubber band into his shirt pocket and peeled off a bill.

“Got change?”  He put a curled up one hundred-dollar bill under my nose.

“Uh, no,” I said as I unconsciously reached into my pockets with both hands and felt the bus ride home coins.

“He,he, buoy, that’s a joke.”  He chuckled.

“Oh, I didn’t know.”

“Well, you think (tink) this will cover your ring and stuff?”

“Yes.”

“Good.  Don’t show this to your father, or for that matter, your mother.  Hide it until Monday then take it to school and pay for your stuff.  Then have some fun with the rest of the money.  You young…you should be having fun.”

“OK.”

“I mean it.”

“OK.”

“Got a girlfriend?”

“No.”

“Well, you show the girls dis money and you have a lot of girlfriends!”  He laughed deeply and ended up with a coughing spasm.

Finally he cleared his throat and took a deep breath. “Well buoy.  I’m proud of you.  You did something we never did.  That’s good.  You won’t have to paint cars or trucks to eat, eh?”

“I hope not.”

“Good, now go home so you can go get holy with your father at the church.  The bus should be here in a few minutes.”

“OK, uncle.  Thank you very much for the money.  I’ll think of you whenever I look at my ring, and I’ll try very hard to get to the graduation.  Thank you uncle.”

“No thanks.  You deserve to enjoy this.  You earned it.  And, never mind what your folks say…I love you and think of you often.  Now go!”

I turned and started to walk out of the paint shop.  I think it must’ve been the sun hitting my eyes after being in the cool shade of the shop because tears began flowing down my face.  Never in my life had I ever cried unless I had experienced some physical pain.  But here I was, walking back out through that gritty oil soaked dirt lot half blinded by the sun and the flood of tears pouring from my eyes.  It was the first time in my life that I’d known that much happiness and gratitude all at one time.

Looking up I saw that I was approaching a concrete pad on which there was a gas pump, an air hose, and a water hose.  Putting the now wrinkled bill that I had been squeezing unmercifully into my pocket I reached for the water hose.  Bending over I let the cool water splash onto my face.  Even though it smelled a bit like rubber the water felt good and helped me control my emotions a bit.

Drying my face with my shirt sleeve I got my bearings and headed toward the gate.

It was after I had boarded the bus and had taken my seat for the long trip home that the reality of what was about to happen crept up my spine like a slow cold chill.

What would I tell my mother?

I began to shake.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ah, Stress, I Hardly Knew Ye…(Part 1)

A few days ago I read something curious on my Facebook page.  It was an entry by a young lady barely into her teen years, and it consisted of just one word: “Stressed”.  A couple of her FB friends quickly made comment entries such as, “What’s wrong”?, ” Why”?, and “Text me.”   No answer back, nor any further information as to the cause of the stress.  It just ended there.

But…my curiosity had been stoked, and I wondered what in her life had caused her to feel that she had to reach out to her social contacts to tell them she was stressed.  She was young, in middle school, and from what I knew had a pretty decent life.  Since she hadn’t appealed directly to me, or anyone else for that matter–and she hadn’t responded to the immediate queries–I was just left to wonder.

After thinking for a while I began to wonder about my life back when I was a young teen, and even younger, and tried to recall when I may have first felt what we would now define as “stress”.

For those of you who know me well and are familiar with my early years already know that at about age fourteen I began to have some pretty interesting experiences when my parents decided to return to that Pentecostal religion that they had unceremoniously left long before I was born.

Up until that fateful day my life had consisted mostly of going to school, coming home to do my homework, slipping out to the back yard to shoot hoops  on a raggedy-ass backboard and rim, and waiting for my mother to yell me back into the house for a lean dinner.  Then it was off to my corner of the house (I never had a bedroom–hell, I never had a space to call my own in any of our many rented houses) finish off any homework I had left to do, and finally go off to  listen to my parent’s only real earthly possession, the 1940’s vintage Philco console radio.  There, with the lights off and while sitting on the floor with my back resting against the wooden front of the large console radio, I would close my eyes and float off into the wonderful world of my imagination.  Thirty minute programs with names such as, “The Shadow”, “Gang Busters”, “The Inner Sanctum”, and “The Lone Ranger” (Hiyooo Silver, away…..), would take me to places I’d never seen, have me riding horses in dusty western towns, and soak me in mysterious intrigue and delicious mysteries.  All these imaginary voyages were taken as I sat quietly on the cold linoleum floor, and seen through my mind’s eye as clearly and vividly as if I had installed a seventy inch HD Smart Plasma 600 mHz TV into my brain.

Before my parents started dragging me to the Pentecostal church just about every day of the week my only recreation had been that old radio and my back yard hoops. Because my father had been drinking away almost every dollar that he earned as a painter/diesel mechanic, my mother and I weren’t left with any”disposable income”. What money we did have came was as a result of her surreptitious rifling through my passed out dad’s pockets after he had returned in the early hours of the morning after his all night binges.  The nickels, pennies, dimes, and the occasional crumpled dollar bill my mother found went for food mostly, then if able, a few clothes.  Bottom line, that pretty much made any outside teenage social recreation virtually non existent; and that included activities such as movies, dances, or even dropping by the local drugstore for a malt.  (Uh, we didn’t have a local drugstore in the barrio).

Oddly, I can truthfully say that I really didn’t know what I was missing.  It is often said that the poor usually don’t feel poor, and that’s the way it was for me.  It was what it was, and that was that!  No stress.

So, admittedly, the late 1940’s, all of the 1950’s and the early 1960’s were a completely different era in most areas of life.  The kids we now call “millennials” don’t have a clue, nor do I believe they are experiencing life in rich juicy technicolor as we did.  As I begin to bring the memories of those times back into focus  it’s clear that we were actually a pretty hip generation.  For music and general media-type entertainment most of us had radios (mono),  a privileged few had TVs (most with a tiny black and white screen), and most of us had telephones (black, large, and rotary dial).  Much like today my generation’s taste in clothing, speech and general swagger was highly influenced by pop singers, TV and movie stars, and to some degree made up on the spot by those more creative “cats” in their own little individual clan-like groups.  Hand-me-down words and phrases like “cool”, “groovy” and “you guys”, were imported from the previous generation and pushed on to the next; and overused phrases like “neato”, “hep cat”, “swell” and “rat fink”  were driven straight into hip-talk extinction (thank God).

Of course I vividly remember having some mildly harsh feelings towards those kids whom I considered the “privileged” (hep cats driving raked 1950 Fords and Chevys), because  I always had to ride the bus.  And bullying?  Yup, plenty of that for sure, and dealt with in one of several ways: be a patsy and get pummeled on a regular basis, or suck it up and attack the bully when he/she wasn’t looking then run like hell.  The second option usually worked pretty good as it sent the bullies the message that the skinny little freak could and would  hit back.  But then there was a third option that a few of us lucky ones had access to: Personal Bullies.  Robert was mine.

He was nine months older, way bigger, and knew to how to fight dirty (first you kick them in the balls then the rest is easy).  But more importantly he was insanely loyal to me for a couple of reasons.  First, we pretty much grew up in the same neighborhood, (thereby sharing a commonality), he’d never known his parents (lived with a grandmother), and was crazy envious that I had a real mom and dad, and oh, I also did most of his homework.  No big deal for me as he was taking extremely easy classes, but the stuff I did for him pretty much kept him at my beck and call.  Whenever I was threatened by some neanderthal I would sulk away quietly, then find and tell Robert.  Then, much like today’s Energizer Bunny, off he’d go–pointy shoes looking for nut sacks.  Most of the northside neighborhood we lived in, and that included an elementary school, a junior high and a high school, knew about Robert and his flying kicks and flailing fists.  He was feared mightily and by proxy, so was I.  Nope, no stress there.

Alright, so I would guess my first few experiences with stress occurred when report cards were issued.  I usually started worrying about the state of my grades around final exam time, but mostly I worried about the state that parts of my body would be in if I brought home a report card with anything lower than an “A” or a “B”.  You see,my mother only went as far as the 3rd grade and one of the things she retained in those three years was that “A’s” and “B’s” were good, and “C,D, and F’s” were bad.  I lived and died by that simple equation, and so by default that made me a pretty good student.  As someone very close to me once said, “Fear is a great motivator.”

The first time I had a mark lower than an “B” on my report card happened in the 6th grade.  It was a “C” in Science that had been reduced from an “A” due to the teacher thinking that I had cheated on a quiz.  I hadn’t cheated, and in fact had been telling the dweeb behind me that I was not going to give him the answer to number 3 during the quiz.  The teacher rushed over, took both our papers and smeared a big red “F” across the front.  That was enough to drag my final grade down.  Stress building.

So now here I was, getting off the bus with my report card in my coat pocket.  That semi-circle of a letter was oozing pure red fear; and as I walked the three blocks to my house my knees began to turn to jelly.  Regaining my balance after coming close to toppling over I heard one of the neighbor ladies call my name.  As I looked up I saw her coming down the steps from her porch asking if I was OK.  I stopped.  Then without even thinking about what I was going to say I screamed out:  “My mom’s going to SPANK ME BECAUSE I GOT A “C” IN SCIENCE!”  The last word trailed off into a wretched phlegmy whine, and big watery tears came flooding out of my eyes.

“Why is your mommy going to spank you?”

“Be..be..because I got a “C”…”  (Yowl).

“Oh, that’s no reason for a spanking. No, no, no she won’t.”

“Yes, yes she will”.

“Well, don’t worry.  I’ll walk home with you and make sure she doesn’t spank you”.

And so she did.  And my mom didn’t spank me….well, not until the lady left.  Then I got it really good.  So, maybe that was my very first really stressful experience.

Home life after my full  immersion into extreme Pentecostalism was, well, interesting.  Not having much to eat on a regular basis before we got religion came as a direct result of my dad’s heavy drinking problem.   He’d get paid on Friday and we wouldn’t see him until Sunday morning.  Usually he could be found passed out on the porch if he wasn’t too drunk, or hanging out of the driver’s side of his car if he had tied on a real bender.

After he found Jesus (really, I think it should be the other way around) he developed a new obsession.  Instead of throwing money away in bars he now tried to impress the brothers and sisters in the church with his extremely charitable nature by throwing what little money he earned on trivial bullshit like contributing excessively and extravagantly to the church fund to buy the pastor a new Buick every year.  My mother’s developing health problems, agonizingly painful kidney stones, and the resulting crazy expensive medical bills resulting from her hospital stays, brought on rip roaring high decibel arguments and really did the hokey pokey on my developing teenage angst.  OK, maybe a little stress there.

Because we pretty much lived in the poverty rut I never attended any football, basketball, or baseball games.  I never went to one high school dance or after school party.  Save for the symbolic membership in my school’s French Club (required if you wanted to take French), I belonged to nothing and pretty much didn’t socialize with anyone except maybe Robert.  Besides my thug friend I had no close or really even distant friends.  Lunch time in high school was spent on the front lawn of Jeff Davis High School usually with a small group of lonely girls who had also been outcast from school society for various reasons.  We didn’t talk very much.  Most of the time we just munched our bologna or pressed ham sandwiches in silence, buried in our common dejection.  I’m thinking a more low self esteem thing than stress there.

Health wise, I was a real mess.  Throughout my teen years I suffered from asthma, pus filled pimples and whiteheads, constant earaches, and a raging case of athletes foot.  For a couple of years in high school I contracted chronic jock itch which would, at the most inopportune time, flare up and demand to be scratched mightily and repeatedly.  When that urge subsided the athletes foot would start up.  Neither of these conditions would demand scratching  unless I was delivering a book report in front of the English 101 class, or reciting a Bible verse to Sunday School class at church.  Itchy stress.

Then of course there was the dating scene.  Actually for me, the non-dating scene.  As a teen I never had any kind of serious boy/girl relationship because (1) it was prohibited by our church, (2) I didn’t have any money anyway, (3) I wasn’t popular or particularly attractive, physically or otherwise, (4) our one phone was on a 4 party line, so any date making conversations that I may have wanted to have with anyone would’ve been discussed, dissected and distributed to my entire neighborhood in 1.2 nanoseconds; and (5) any dates would’ve had to have taken place at our Pentecostal church–so that the unfortunate girl could be completely exposed to the “love Jesus or die in eternal flames you sinning scum” sermon.  My constant thought: “I’ll never meet any girls and I will die an old maid”…stress.

But even with all that pressure I still don’t recall ever  having  to reach out to my social group (Robert) and scream, “STRESSED”!  If I had, he would’ve probably whipped out his switch blade, assumed his pointy shoe balls kicking stance, and screamed, “WHERE?”

So, having recalled all these experiences– I guess in a way–my way– I may have been, OK, maybe a little stressed, but I was just just too dumb to know it.  Also, and more to the point, my generation, and particularly the kids in my neighborhood,  just didn’t use that word as part of our daily dialogue.  The same for phrases such as ADHD, emotionally challenged, PC, culturally disadvantaged, and many many other current catch phrases and words.

Looking back at those colorful years I think we just tried to live the best we could and complain as little as possible.  We lived day by day without understanding that all those feelings of inadequacy, guilt, sorrow, fear, angst, pity, melancholy, sadness, anguish and dejection could’ve just been lumped into that one word: Stress.  But hey, who knew?

To be continued…….